Overheard at Crank

The zombie apocalypse has reached Crank. What weapon do you reach for to defend yourself?

Chris: A Fireman’s axe, because it doesn’t run out of ammo.

Justin: A 50cal bolt action rifle with a Leupold scope.

If you didn’t go down the road of bike shop ownership, what would you be doing with yourselves?

Chris: Hacking the gibson.

Justin: Street drifting.

What are some of your favorite local spots? Readers beware, both Chris and Justin live in the neighborhood!

Chris: Stark Naked Pizza, Coalition Brewing, Ole Ole Burritos.

Justin: Crema Bakery, The Laurelhurst Theater, Lone Fir Cemetery.

You’ve been granted one fantasy bicycle, what do you wish for?

Chris: A recumbant bicycle capable of hitting 88mph so that when things get real I can go back in time and stop the zombie apocalypse.

Justin: A DI2 equipped full carbon cargo bike with a mini bar.

What one song would you play at work for an entire day? Business partners sanity aside.

Chris: Born Slippy, Underworld.

Justin: Straight out of Compton, NWA.

What is your favorite way to get a workout without a bicycle?

Chris: Free Diving.

Justin: Squatz and oatz.

If you could add anyone feature to your bike shop what would it be?

Chris & Justin Simultaneously: Hot tub.

What is one thing that people would be surprised to hear you do?

Chris: I go mushroom hunting, and no, not for that kind of mushroom.

Justin: Home bake bread every week.

Favorite book, movie, artist:

Chris: The Integral Trees by Larry Niven, Drunken Tai-Chi, Chicane.

Justin:  Do Androids Dream Of Electric Sheep,  Heat, Orbital.

You’ve got your fantasy bike, now what superpower do you have?

Chris: The Von Neumann power. The ability to turn anyone else into me.

Justin: Having an unbreakable skeleton.

Quick! Business partners best quirk?

Chris: Justin’s ability to learn rapidly without any instruction.

Justin: Chris’s patient teaching style.

Most coffee in one day:

Chris: 26 shots of espresso.

Justin: 12 shots of espresso.

Favorite thing to do at work?

Chris: Rebuild hubs.

Justin: Work on single speed mountain bikes.

Favorite Race?

Chris & Justin: Alpenrose cross crusade.

Favorite Ride?

Chris & Justin: Council crest to skyline to newberry road in the early fall.

2 thoughts on “Overheard at Crank

  1. Alpenrose? You LIKE the crowds? Seriously?
    That race is a Cecil B. DeMille mob scene.

    And the Zombie defense thing? Justin. A rifle with a scope? Isn’t that a bit of, um, overkill for the Already Dead?

  2. Hilarious. You are so different and so similar.

    Justin wants to be Gumby… On squatz and oatz.

    Chris, I too love hunting for edible mushrooms on the Oregon Coast. Let’s go sometime! After a new PR, 27 shots of espresso!

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